People always tell me to treasure my kids while they are little. In the middle of my exhaustion, piles of pee-saturated laundry, and sticky everything, I think "I am!". I DO drink in their smell when a sweaty little person pauses long enough to let me scoop them up on my lap. I DO kiss their sleeping cheeks every night, and breathe in deep, savoring the moment. I DO rock them to sleep as often as they will let me. I feel sad when each haircut makes them look older, and when each milestone gets passed.
Sometimes I long for the freedom and quiet that will partially return as my kids take on more and more independence. Often I grow weary in the daily, nitty-gritty, constant training required in these early, road paving years. Most days I feel like the weight of the previous day has just barely lifted when the new day begins.
But I'm learning that training hearts is much heavier (and scarier) than night-time feedings, or colic. It's much harder to teach (and model? :/ ) heart attitudes and relationship with our Creator than it is to muscle through the ever-constant "that's-a-no-no" stage. It's easier to pick up a house-full of strewn toys than it is to release them to make choices on their own.
Raising babies starts out with physical exhaustion, but with a full heart. And as our kids start to make their own choices, the exhaustion moves deeper... into our hearts.
Fear comes because it is scary to let our kids make choices. What if they choose something that has permanent negative consequences? What if they choose something that damages our relationship, and hurts me? What if they shut me out? What if they shut God out?
And yet we have to risk the pain involved in letting them make choices...
I understand a little more now, what people mean when they say to treasure them while they are little. Right now, "bad choices" means hitting another kid in sunday school, intentionally being mean to a sibling, being disrespectful to me, doing something (again!) that I said not to do... and while those choices hurt me, when THEY hurt I can fix it with snuggles, kisses, and a prayer. They trust me almost completely still, and I'm still their safe spot.
I think what "those people" mean is more like this...
Treasure their innocence
Treasure the safety in your relationship with them
Treasure the trust they freely give you
Treasure the ability to fix ANYTHING with an outpouring of your love
~
God refers to Himself as our Father. There is certainly nothing wrong with His parenting, and yet WE make bad choices. What's so amazing about that is that His offer still stands, even in the face of the pain we cause Him all.the.time. His love for us is so great that He is willing to give us the freedom to make our own choices, knowing we would make choices that hurt Him and each other. He knew that with the freedom to choose poorly comes the freedom to choose to LOVE!
What a mighty God we serve! May He keep our hearts open and soft, like His, as we give our kids freedom.
Sometimes I long for the freedom and quiet that will partially return as my kids take on more and more independence. Often I grow weary in the daily, nitty-gritty, constant training required in these early, road paving years. Most days I feel like the weight of the previous day has just barely lifted when the new day begins.
But I'm learning that training hearts is much heavier (and scarier) than night-time feedings, or colic. It's much harder to teach (and model? :/ ) heart attitudes and relationship with our Creator than it is to muscle through the ever-constant "that's-a-no-no" stage. It's easier to pick up a house-full of strewn toys than it is to release them to make choices on their own.
Raising babies starts out with physical exhaustion, but with a full heart. And as our kids start to make their own choices, the exhaustion moves deeper... into our hearts.
Fear comes because it is scary to let our kids make choices. What if they choose something that has permanent negative consequences? What if they choose something that damages our relationship, and hurts me? What if they shut me out? What if they shut God out?
And yet we have to risk the pain involved in letting them make choices...
I understand a little more now, what people mean when they say to treasure them while they are little. Right now, "bad choices" means hitting another kid in sunday school, intentionally being mean to a sibling, being disrespectful to me, doing something (again!) that I said not to do... and while those choices hurt me, when THEY hurt I can fix it with snuggles, kisses, and a prayer. They trust me almost completely still, and I'm still their safe spot.
I think what "those people" mean is more like this...
Treasure their innocence
Treasure the safety in your relationship with them
Treasure the trust they freely give you
Treasure the ability to fix ANYTHING with an outpouring of your love
~
God refers to Himself as our Father. There is certainly nothing wrong with His parenting, and yet WE make bad choices. What's so amazing about that is that His offer still stands, even in the face of the pain we cause Him all.the.time. His love for us is so great that He is willing to give us the freedom to make our own choices, knowing we would make choices that hurt Him and each other. He knew that with the freedom to choose poorly comes the freedom to choose to LOVE!
What a mighty God we serve! May He keep our hearts open and soft, like His, as we give our kids freedom.
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