She was outside playing with the big boys. She loves them with all her heart, and they love her, and sometimes they don't know their strength. I patted the baby's bottom, rocking and swaying and spying out the window at them all. They had been buddies all day, which is unusual, and resulted in way more mess than usual.
The big boys are on the verge of bits of "man" showing through, and I feel a mix of sadness and pride. Roo is beginning to find her voice and her confidence, and they let her tag along.
Their voices were high and their shoulders sweaty. All their little (and big) hands gripped the same rope, and their imaginary world had mostly taken over.
I could see the potential for a wild and unintentional injury. It's almost always the smaller ones that get hurt. But everyone must learn their strength, their limits, and to think for themselves and look out for others.
Sure enough... they came parading in- blood and tears and "I DIDN'T MEAN TO!!".
I scooped up the bloody little face in my arms. I felt her body shake and she squeezed up her little nose in stinging pain. She had a scrape all across her nose and one part of her cheek. She had hit the ground pretty hard, and her tears weren't just fear, they were pain.
She hadn't seen her own face yet, but as she calmed I thought of the freckles that laid under the damaged skin. Her face is so captivatingly beautiful, my heart was moved to see her all roughed-up.
I know the Father feels that way.
I know He watches, seeing our potential for catastrophe, watching us bravely risk our hearts to experience relationship. Sometimes He lingers when we get hurt, ready to scoop us up and pour out comfort. I know it hurts Him to see His creations damaged, and I know He sees through to the healing. I know we are still beautiful to Him when we are injured.
I know He also sees when we don't know our strength. Sometimes He watches as we pull that rope a little too hard and our sister goes flying. He walks us through the lesson in measuring how hard we tug on someone else. He teaches us that it should be our concern for others that motivates us to measure our actions, not the fear of punishment.
The man-boy muscle moment turned into an opportunity for a boy to show compassion and offer a bond of sibling-hood. The damaged damsel has opportunity still to allow others to notice her injury (it is on her FACE...), and not shrink back in shame for having taken the risk of playing with the big boys. She gets to carry a story of choosing to risk again, out of the bond of trust between her and brother, who is learning how to love a creature very different from himself.
The whole thing is risk and reconciliation and measures of inward and outward strength. Relationship is beautiful and scary and complicated, and the Father longs for it. He long for us to love Him and each other, and for us to let Him love us a little deeper.
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