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Labor Pains

My little family ((are we still considered "little??")) had lunch with a dear friend of mine yesterday, who is just-about-due pregnant with her first little boy. We had beautiful conversation about children, marriage, family, relationships, and -of course- labor and delivery. I revisited our conversation a lot in my head, and today some things fell into place in my heart.

Recently I've been asked to walk through a tough situation. Unfortunately I must be rather vague about it, but I hope that what I can describe to you makes sense. I have felt my heart aching and groaning under the strain and pain of what I'm walking through. Today I was struck by the similarities between my situation and labor pains... the ebb and flow of pressure and pain, all with a goal in mind. As I mentally walked back through my four labor experiences,  my heart came to rest on a particular stage of labor. I thought most about the stage when my mind begins to resist the labor. When labor first begins I am so excited that I'm happy to feel the pain, and I lean in to each wave of pressure, focused on the joy of the end result! As my body and my mind wear down, and as the pain rises to it's peak (right before it's all over!), my mind begins to resist... I experienced this mental shift with both the boys, with Evelyn, and also with Ruby. I was most prepared for Ruby's labor, and I had spent time training my mind to join the labor instead of resisting it, so I had a plan when I reached that stage of inner panic. Instead of resisting, I sat upright and leaned forward, wrapping my arms around my husband, grabbing handfuls of his shirt and burying my head in his chest. I fully embraced the climax of pressure and pain, breathing, clinging, letting the waves wash over me as I leaned in to my man.

That is the stage I'm in, in this trial I've been asked to walk through. I know it's almost over, but deep inside me I ache to resist these final waves of pressure and pain. Today God spoke to me, and asked me to sit upright, lean forward, wrap my arms around Him, and grab fistfuls of any part of Him that I can. He reminded me that in these final waves I must bury my face in HIS chest, dig my fingers in to HIS garment, and cling to HIM with all I can muster, until it's all over and I receive what I have been laboring for.

Clinging to my husband like that during labor didn't ease the pain, it refocused my heart. The same is true with this trial: as I lean in, clinging desperately to my Creator, the pain and pressure does not disappear.
But I am comforted, refocused, and my heart shifts into place.

I understand, a little more:
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Philippians 4:13

What a mighty God we serve.

Comments

  1. <3 This blessed my heart, and brought tears to my eyes. I am so amazed at the beautiful way that God speaks to you and the grace and loveliness with which you express it. Thank you for sharing. <3 -R.

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  2. Refocusing your heart. I like that. Thanks for being so encouraging, Anna, just by expressing your struggles and what God is teaching you!

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