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Showing posts from October, 2012

Be Still

A couple Sundays ago I sat by myself in church again. Little Roo snuggled into my arms, wide awake and vibrant! My handsome husband was up leading worship, and as his gentle voice rang out to our Creator, my heart began to search for God's. A few weeks ago I asked God to tell me that He loved me, and much to my enjoyment- He did! The response was immediate, before I finished thinking my thought... Psalm 139: 1 O L ORD , You have searched me and known me. 2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. 3 You scrutinize my path and my lying down, And are intimately acquainted with all my ways. 4 Even before there is a word on my tongue, Behold, O L ORD , You know it all. 5 You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me... The rest of that Psalm is equally as beautiful. I sat still for a moment, pondering how I could have known of God my whole life have it not be until that moment that I heard Him spea

Beautiful Redemption

This weekend I tasted sweet, sweet intentional redemption from our Father... Last year I went to Women of Faith with my mom and her church. I went expecting to release the last of my sorrow over losing Evelyn. The band Selah was there, and they represent a lot of what happened in my heart while I carried Evelyn. Last year I sat in the front row of our suite with empty arms, bracing myself for the wave of pain I knew I would feel when Selah came onto the stage. The wave came crashing, and my mom wept silently with me over the daughter I will not see again on earth. It tasted bitter, but as I drank in the music, my heart healed a little more. This year as Women of Faith started, the very first song was embellished by petite ballerinas, dancing sweetly and elegantly for their Father. I sat in the front row again, this time with my arms warm with a beautiful little girl that God has loaned to me. This year the wave that hit me was actually more like a whisper (isn't it incredible h

God's calling

I must start by stating that I am quite preoccupied as I write this... a sweet, beautiful little girl is sitting next to me, cooing and smiling up at me :) I've been rather up-to-my-neck in children lately, but found refreshed joy in raising them after a conversation with a friend. We talked about how we are not to just train behaviors, but cultivate men and women of God... we are to look for God's calling on their lives, and join with Him in that. Here's what I see in my children: We bought the boy new bibles recently- they were QUITE excited about it! Jonathan has always been very vibrant! From his earliest months he has loved people, and music. He is a DO-er, full of energy, questions and ideas. In him I see leadership, intelligence, and a deep, deep capacity for understanding spirituality. Currently I'm training him on how to use his energy in productive ways, and to be responsible for his own actions. He is learning how to lead his brother into good behavi