Skip to main content

Rocking


We are celebrating Jonathan's 3rd birthday today! Jonathan still lets/wants me to rock him before bed, and when I was rocking him recently I was thinking about when I rocked him as an infant... and how at the time I couldn't imagine him as big as he is now...

Another thought about rocking, very much related: The boys are still adjusting to our new place, and with Henry that means he wants "upa?" even more than normal (to be carried). I've been racing around like a wild-woman trying to get our house unpacked before all the birthday parties this weekend, so on the particular day I'm thinking of, I didn't initially want to take the time to pause my racing and hold Henry. I had turned on a CD in the kitchen, hoping the calming songs would soothe my wild boys into playing in a bit more contained, less destructive manner. I stood in the kitchen and complied with Henry's "upa?" request, and started rocking to the music. He nestled in, and we listened... the CD playing was a "soothing songs" mix that Josh had made for me to rock Jonathan to, when he was tiny. My mind went two places: one, back to the early days of my Mommy-hood. The sweet, sweet memories of discovering how it feels to hold and infant that is your own. My mind also went back to the season my family and I are just coming out of, during which, my prayers were much like Henry's current request. I just wanted to be lifted, carried, held. I'm sure God's heart loves holding a child of His own, just as much as mine does. I want to remember to ask God to lift, carry, hold me, even when I am not in a dark season. Not just for comfort, because I can't survive without it, but just for closeness.

What a privilege to have both my sons still WANT me to rock them.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Pendulum

Boy, where do I start this time? I think I will just be sporadic, with excerpts from an email to dear friends, and some thoughts I want to write about while they are fresh. This post may not be for the faint of heart... grab a cup of tea before reading on. I woke up at 6 this morning to some bleeding (not much, but definitely enough to know it was blood). I felt a trickle as I woke up, and more as I stood. I used the toilet and confirmed what I felt. I sat in the bathroom and breathed out loud, "okay..." My head and my heart began to race. We already had scheduled the Dr.'s first appointment of the day, so I got in the shower to pray, cry, and prepare for the day. I prayed that God would walk closely with me. I prayed that God would receive Evelyn with sweet music and roses. I told God how afraid I was of the coming hours, and most fervently I prayed that God would prepare my husband to hear of my bleeding (he was still asleep). After my shower I told Josh, and t...
3 comments
Read more

Small Victory

I have a small victory to share with you:  Let me give some context... I blogged about the loss of children recently, verbally stomping my feet and telling the enemy that I will have no more of it- and that I have chosen my side and refuse to budge. The children God has given me "on loan" are all so different... Jonathan was an easy baby, and is currently a whirl-wind 3 1/2 yr old- he is FULL of energy, curiosity, music, rythm, he is friendly, relational, deep (yes, deep!), always thinking, processing, talking... He knows about God and that Jesus is real, and he knows that his baby sister Evelyn is safe with Jesus. Henry was a difficult baby, and is an easy 2 yr-old!  He adores his  brother and wants to be where he is, he gives AMAZING hugs, likes to be held, likes books, connects quickly with people, is caring, noisy, talkative, fast... and still has his innocence. He likes to pray. Evelyn has changed my life more than anything. Her body was tiny, but her exis...
11 comments
Read more

The Snag

  Are you tired of hearing about sickness yet?      Seems like a swirl of illness has been making its way through all the pods of community around us. Despite all our elderberry and all the home remedies this grow-your-own geek Mama could muster, the germs entered our household too.    The big ones were down first, a sister shortly after. Then the Little Bear, and Papa Bear. One sister and I escaped, and eventually even the combination of our introverted selves and a can't-go-anywhere week finally gave way to some restlessness. She began begging to be dropped off at a friend's house, and I think I inwardly begged the same- ha!    I hadn't quite counted the cost of it all. The week wrapped up, and the nights settled, but the sour and the "hey Mama"s continued. All of a sudden my heart began to resist. The quiet, restful days had been nice for a little while. I got some projects done that I don't have time for during full-swing school at the table. ...
Post a Comment
Read more