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Dancing

Jonathan and Henry followed me into my closet this morning. I was thumbing through the shirts hanging in front of me, deciding what to wear for the day when they discovered my little pile of "Evelyn stuff". Jonathan picked up a soft, pink stuffed animal that was given to us in honor of her, during the time that she was still inside me and after we knew we probably wouldn't get to keep her. Jonathan asked me if he could play with the animal, and I told him that he could, but that the animal had to stay in my closet. Since he's 3, he immediately asked me why, and I explained the significance. He knows that Evelyn was in my tummy and that she went to live with Jesus and that while Mommy is sad about it sometimes, that it's okay because she's safe and happy. Henry then found a tiny pair of ballet shoe-looking socks that were also given to us for her, "Shooo?", he says. "Yep, shoe, Henry. Those are to remind us that Evelyn is dancing with Jesus." Jonathan asked why again, and we got to talking about it all...
Later this morning we were in the car and I decided to pick the conversation up again. I asked Jonathan if he knew where Jesus lives, and a few normal questions like that. Jonathan informed me that he wanted to, "get in a arplane or hecopter or someping and fly wayway and pick up Jesus and Evelyn and put baby Evelyn back in you's tummy." Oh, sweet boy :) We talked about believing that Jesus is real and about needing to believe that to get in to heaven- all the while my heart soaring. I've had a handful of sudden emotional moments in church along this line: the most recent one was watching baptisms. First, a tall, thin brown haired boy was baptized. Then a shorter, blonde haired boy went. Do you see why my heart lept? More than anything else, ever- I want my children to know their Savior.
Evelyn Rose got to know Him first, and in-person. Maybe someday soon her brothers will, through her short, prenatal life, begin a relationship with Him too.
More on dancing... all over FB right now I am seeing posts about a young girl from our church spending her first hours dancing with her Savior. My heart mourns SO DEEPLY for her family, and at the same time I am a little jealous that Kayla gets to dance with Evelyn (and JESUS!) before I do. I know I am to remain here on earth, for this reason:
My children's generation has a strong calling for their Creator. It has become so obvious, in all the lives lost or threatened just in the last 6 months. Miscarriages, stillbirths, accidents... all at our little church. Clearly our little-ones are to do something big! In the time I am given I will make it my TOP priority to do my best to encourage my children to join the ranks of the winning side of this battle!
"Take heart, for I have overcome the world." -Jesus

Comments

  1. muchomalgatoAugust 4, 2011 at 6:43 PM

    Anna, your blogs always leave me in tears. I admire your strength as many have already told you, and I pray that God will continue to bring healing to your beautiful family. You have such an anointing as a mother and the testimony that is being built in you is so inspiring.

    ReplyDelete
  2. HeidiAugust 4, 2011 at 7:50 PM

    Absolutely beautiful!! and thanks for the card today!! :-)

    ReplyDelete

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