Skip to main content

Left Turn



This morning I felt some things stir in my heart that I hope to carefully articulate, with honor and honesty. This year our life took a sudden left turn. With a whisper of the Lord's leading, we uprooted and painfully left behind years of kingdom investment. We left the ground we had sown and tended, just as the harvest seemed to be near. We surrendered big dreams and big plans to the Lord, and He gave them away.

As I'm writing, I have my favorite album from my favorite artist blasting... Brave New World by Amanda Cook. Fitting, right?

She writes about the character of this enormous God. Her lyrics weave the waves of His mercy, His steadiness, His goodness. She wanders through tides of revelation after revelation of His magnificence. Her lyrics are surrender and rising as one.

This album is important to me for so many reasons, but today's reason is just that- surrender and rising.

Surrender AND rising.

With the Lord, surrender is not defeat. When we find ourselves in a corner and we have to lay down our dreams and our plans, He lifts our heads away from defeat, up to His upside down, magnificent character. He never forgets who He made us to be, He never cancels His pursuit of us, He never wastes.

In surrender we gain more of Him, even when the circumstances are painful, and He pulls us into His great generosity lifts us up.

When I look for Him, He's always there- He has promised to never leave or forsake me. I see Him in our season of labor in the hot sun, with hopeful expectations. I see Him in the planting, the tilling, the weeding. I see Him in the rain and the waiting. I see Him as plants begin to rise, and anticipation grows. He still has not forsaken, in that left turn, in the surrendered harvest. He has promised to never leave or forsake me, and I believe Him.

I know He is good and magnificent. He can hold my hopes, and all harvest belongs to Him anyway. In His promise to never leave or forsake me, I can surrender, because He is a masterful gardener, and the seasons and left turns will not get the better of Him.

Through it all He remains faithful and good.

He never forgets who He made me to be.
He never cancels His pursuit of me.
I am held by the Steady One.

Comments

  1. UnknownJanuary 2, 2018 at 8:53 AM

    Since God is infinite when you make a left turn you will end up running into Him cause He's a never ending circle!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Small Victory

I have a small victory to share with you:  Let me give some context... I blogged about the loss of children recently, verbally stomping my feet and telling the enemy that I will have no more of it- and that I have chosen my side and refuse to budge. The children God has given me "on loan" are all so different... Jonathan was an easy baby, and is currently a whirl-wind 3 1/2 yr old- he is FULL of energy, curiosity, music, rythm, he is friendly, relational, deep (yes, deep!), always thinking, processing, talking... He knows about God and that Jesus is real, and he knows that his baby sister Evelyn is safe with Jesus. Henry was a difficult baby, and is an easy 2 yr-old!  He adores his  brother and wants to be where he is, he gives AMAZING hugs, likes to be held, likes books, connects quickly with people, is caring, noisy, talkative, fast... and still has his innocence. He likes to pray. Evelyn has changed my life more than anything. Her body was tiny, but her exis...
11 comments
Read more

Evelyn Rose

It's time to write about Evelyn Rose. We knew I was pregnant around Thanksgiving 2010 (no test, we just knew!). We waited to tell family until Christmas, and had our first Dr. appointment in January '11. In march we had an ultrasound and discovered we were having a girl! After a couple hours of high excitement and celebration over our coming baby girl, I received a phone call from our Doctor. She had hard news for me- that our little girl was very small, and her brain was not forming right. We scheduled an ultrasound with a specialist, and prayed deeply for a week, for healing. During that week I prepared myself for a miracle, and also reached a place where I was overjoyed to take care of her, regardless of her condition. I did not prepare myself to lose her. At our next appointment we met with a "genetic counselor", and I let most of what she said roll off of me, thinking it would not apply to us. We loved seeing her during the ultrasound- her feet, hands, face, eye...
9 comments
Read more

Beautiful Redemption

This weekend I tasted sweet, sweet intentional redemption from our Father... Last year I went to Women of Faith with my mom and her church. I went expecting to release the last of my sorrow over losing Evelyn. The band Selah was there, and they represent a lot of what happened in my heart while I carried Evelyn. Last year I sat in the front row of our suite with empty arms, bracing myself for the wave of pain I knew I would feel when Selah came onto the stage. The wave came crashing, and my mom wept silently with me over the daughter I will not see again on earth. It tasted bitter, but as I drank in the music, my heart healed a little more. This year as Women of Faith started, the very first song was embellished by petite ballerinas, dancing sweetly and elegantly for their Father. I sat in the front row again, this time with my arms warm with a beautiful little girl that God has loaned to me. This year the wave that hit me was actually more like a whisper (isn't it incredible h...
7 comments
Read more