I don't know that I'm ready to try to explain the season I have entered spiritually to you all, because I don't fully understand it myself. Honestly I'm more than a little bit nervous about it. I have been timidly asking God to push me a bit beyond my comfort zone for awhile now, and BOY HAS HE ANSWERED. I don't want to become one of those people that is written off as having fallen off the deep end- I want to be logical, loving, gentle, and only outspoken when I have to be ;)
I have been aware of the reality of both dark and light spiritual forces my whole life. My dad read aloud "This Present Darkness", and "Piercing the Darkness" by Frank Perretti when I was a kid (GO READ THEM!!). Those books gave a mental picture to the spiritual battle I knew was raging silently and invisibly around us.
Ephesians 6:12 (NIV)
Early in my adulthood I saw a demon for the first time (I had sensed them prior but had never seen one). I knew that as believers we have authority over them through the blood of Jesus. I knew that Jesus had already won the battle that was raging, and I knew I had chosen my side.
Hebrews 2
14Since the children ((us!)) have flesh and blood, He ((Jesus!)) too shared in their humanity so that by His death He might break the power of him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil— 15and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death. (WAHOO!!)
The next chapter of my spiritual life is and has been learning about the physical reality of the spiritual forces on GOD's side! ...it only makes sense that God would want me to be JUST as physically aware of HIS team members as I am of the enemy's. Sometimes demons are willing to show themselves in an effort to scare me... and God is willing to show me how real HE is too. I had never asked Him to show me- I hadn't even thought of it. I knew God was real, and demons had volunteered to show themselves to me (I certainly hadn't asked!). I was content to keep the spiritual world separate from my physical world. Then I could operate spiritually when I wanted to, but (in my head) I could just live my human life most of the time.
About a year ago I came across a quote that struck a chord in my heart,
"Refuse to be content with just the knowledge of God, insist on experiencing His presence."
I even wrote it out on a little note card and put it on my counter for inspiration.
I had no idea what I was getting myself into! :)
I thought that meant that during the music at church, I might sense more that God was listening (from Heaven, of course...), or that He would whisper more directly to me during my quiet times. Again, I had no idea what I was in for.
This is the part of this blog entry that I cross the proverbial "chicken line". I'm actually physically nervous, as I type. I know this officially makes me one of those "Christian wackos", but there's no going back. I'm in the game now, and I'm through sitting on the sidelines.
A couple days ago God decided to make me acutely aware of the Holy Spirit's PHYSICAL presence. I didn't see anything, but unwillingly, and without a doubt, I felt it. I was in a meeting with some other believers, and I started to feel nervous. "What, God?", I thought. Normally I feel that heart-racing feeling when God wants me to speak up. "What do you want me to say?" I heard nothing. The meeting continued and that nervous feeling continued as well. "Go away, this is getting uncomfortable!", I thought. Half an hour went by, and I couldn't shake it. "Stopit!" I kept thinking, "either tell me what you want me to say, or just stop!". The meeting began to close in prayer, and as the other believers turned their attention to our Creator, I could no longer deny what I felt. I spoke up finally, interrupted their prayers and voiced what I as feeling. It was then that I knew that the Holy Spirit was warning me that my family was under spiritual attack. The enemy had sent his troops to rage war against my family. The believers around me began to pray, as I hunkered down deeper into my chair. His presence was still pressing me, so they stood on my behalf. I couldn't make my body stand, so I knelt instead, my head and my arms tucked down low. I felt pressed down, unable to lift my arms and legs. I'm not sure how much time passed, but godly men and women stayed and prayed until I felt relief.
Most of the time the Holy Spirit operates as a "still, small voice". But I am writing to testify how PHYSICALLY REAL the Holy Spirit is. I experienced great, terrifying power. But this time, that Power was on my side.
I have since told God that that whole thing scared me, and I'm not sure I want to do it again... but I have come away grateful to have physical evidence of both sides of the battle, and with a deeply renewed, healthy fear of God's power! God wins (has already won!), and He is REAL, powerful, terrifying, full of grace and mercy, and will never leave or forsake me!
With more emphasis than ever before, what a mighty God we serve!!
I have been aware of the reality of both dark and light spiritual forces my whole life. My dad read aloud "This Present Darkness", and "Piercing the Darkness" by Frank Perretti when I was a kid (GO READ THEM!!). Those books gave a mental picture to the spiritual battle I knew was raging silently and invisibly around us.
Ephesians 6:12 (NIV)
For our struggle is not against flesh and
blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the
powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in
the heavenly realms.
Hebrews 2
14Since the children ((us!)) have flesh and blood, He ((Jesus!)) too shared in their humanity so that by His death He might break the power of him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil— 15and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death. (WAHOO!!)
The next chapter of my spiritual life is and has been learning about the physical reality of the spiritual forces on GOD's side! ...it only makes sense that God would want me to be JUST as physically aware of HIS team members as I am of the enemy's. Sometimes demons are willing to show themselves in an effort to scare me... and God is willing to show me how real HE is too. I had never asked Him to show me- I hadn't even thought of it. I knew God was real, and demons had volunteered to show themselves to me (I certainly hadn't asked!). I was content to keep the spiritual world separate from my physical world. Then I could operate spiritually when I wanted to, but (in my head) I could just live my human life most of the time.
About a year ago I came across a quote that struck a chord in my heart,
"Refuse to be content with just the knowledge of God, insist on experiencing His presence."
I even wrote it out on a little note card and put it on my counter for inspiration.
I had no idea what I was getting myself into! :)
I thought that meant that during the music at church, I might sense more that God was listening (from Heaven, of course...), or that He would whisper more directly to me during my quiet times. Again, I had no idea what I was in for.
This is the part of this blog entry that I cross the proverbial "chicken line". I'm actually physically nervous, as I type. I know this officially makes me one of those "Christian wackos", but there's no going back. I'm in the game now, and I'm through sitting on the sidelines.
A couple days ago God decided to make me acutely aware of the Holy Spirit's PHYSICAL presence. I didn't see anything, but unwillingly, and without a doubt, I felt it. I was in a meeting with some other believers, and I started to feel nervous. "What, God?", I thought. Normally I feel that heart-racing feeling when God wants me to speak up. "What do you want me to say?" I heard nothing. The meeting continued and that nervous feeling continued as well. "Go away, this is getting uncomfortable!", I thought. Half an hour went by, and I couldn't shake it. "Stopit!" I kept thinking, "either tell me what you want me to say, or just stop!". The meeting began to close in prayer, and as the other believers turned their attention to our Creator, I could no longer deny what I felt. I spoke up finally, interrupted their prayers and voiced what I as feeling. It was then that I knew that the Holy Spirit was warning me that my family was under spiritual attack. The enemy had sent his troops to rage war against my family. The believers around me began to pray, as I hunkered down deeper into my chair. His presence was still pressing me, so they stood on my behalf. I couldn't make my body stand, so I knelt instead, my head and my arms tucked down low. I felt pressed down, unable to lift my arms and legs. I'm not sure how much time passed, but godly men and women stayed and prayed until I felt relief.
Most of the time the Holy Spirit operates as a "still, small voice". But I am writing to testify how PHYSICALLY REAL the Holy Spirit is. I experienced great, terrifying power. But this time, that Power was on my side.
I have since told God that that whole thing scared me, and I'm not sure I want to do it again... but I have come away grateful to have physical evidence of both sides of the battle, and with a deeply renewed, healthy fear of God's power! God wins (has already won!), and He is REAL, powerful, terrifying, full of grace and mercy, and will never leave or forsake me!
With more emphasis than ever before, what a mighty God we serve!!
Anna, thank you for sharing this. I got goose-bumps and almost an overwhelming feeling reading this. I am so excited for you to encounter Him closely, even as war is waged - He will be the victor!!!!!! Praying for you!
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