Renaming TWO

I've never liked the label "THE TERRIBLE TWOs". I don't agree with the mindset it puts Mommas in, or the behavior it condones in two-year-old children.

So, let's rename it!

Age two is often when children really begin realizing that there are options, reasons, choices. That would explain, "why?", "I don't wanna", and "no." Two is when kids become aware of their freedom, and most of them spend a good part of a year intensely testing the limits of that freedom (and their Momma... :) ).

I'm working through this stage with my second two-year-old at the moment, and I've had some realizations along the way. When our oldest, Jonathan, was two, I realized how important this year is. Someone told me that "two" is a time of laying the groundwork for the rest of his childhood- and I agree! It's when we most  firmly establish boundaries, consequences, expectations, and most importantly when we pour the mold for the relationship we will have with that child. I think it's so crucial that we shoulder in to the toughness of this time of intense training, and not shy away from it, hoping it will pass with the next birthday... If we cut corners during this time, they will come back to bite us as our child grows.

Something I'm working to focus on in the midst of all this training is that I not sacrifice my relationship with my child for the sake of "obedience". I'm praying about and learning to USE the relationship to mold the child. Often it's difficult not to take things personally- direct disobedience/defiance specifically... however, if I were to allow my little person's actions to get under my skin in such away that it becomes ME vs. YOU, then our bond becomes dependent on his good or bad choices. Instead our bond should be made of unconditional love on my part, proven through consistency in training coupled with speaking with words and actions what a joy it is to be this little person's Mommy!

Of course I don't mean that I let my kids do whatever they want because I want to be "friends" with them. What I DO mean is that through this time of training, I'm working to put as much effort into training them as I am into speaking love and value to them.

As I launch full-force with my second two-year-old, Henry, I've come upon a whole new realization. Two is also about when children come upon a new level of spiritual awareness! (don't go all theological on me... I don't know when a little soul becomes accountable for eternity- that's God's business not mine)

If I rewind by a couple years, when Jonathan was two I was going through a really unique season spiritually. Jonathan was two while I was carrying Evelyn! He watched me cry out daily to God for her life, he watched me as each footstep was lifted and placed by God's strength alone... Jonathan watched me lean hard on God while he was two. He drank it in, processed it, and believed in the reality of God and Heaven!  Spiritually I'm in a season of peace during Henry's second year, but I do still see the same glimmers of new awareness in him as I did in Jonathan. He is beginning to be afraid of the dark- realizing that there is more to life than what he can see. If he can experience fear of something he can't actually see or touch... it makes sense that the same little heart can feel the peace and love of a God that he can't see or touch as well!

Currently I'm asking God for wisdom on how to show GOD to Henry. As Henry's spiritual awareness takes flight, I want to let him see MY spiritual life. He needs to know more than the story of Noah's Ark- he needs to watch me interact with my Creator! It is essential that I make the most of this time: I don't want to get lost in do's and dont's, I want to mold and cultivate a man of God!

As for renaming age TWO... I haven't landed on a suitable catch-phrase.  I just know that I don't consider this year "terrible". It's an honor to be trusted with such an essential season of a little person's life- both physical and spiritual!