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Long Day

*some of you may have already read this as a "note" on Facebook. I put it here as well, to keep the pieces of my story all in one place, and also for the readers that are not following through FB.

Long Day: I had a bad headache all night last night, and into this morning. After my shower I threw up the crackers I had eaten to settle my stomach (which is still unsettled in the morning). I didn't think much of it, mostly that the headache combined with leftover morning sickness had caused the throwing up... we finished getting ready for the day, packed the troops in the car, and headed to church. Today was potluck so I had brought along some chicken, and the longer we drove, the yuckier it began to smell to me... I asked Josh to pull over, and lost my breakfast. THEN we decided to call the on-call doctor. Headache, nausea, vomiting are all things they had asked me to look out for. Praise God, MY doctor was the one on call today, and she told us it would be best if we came in. We dropped the boys off with grandparents, and headed to the hospital. My head was still throbbing, my hands and face still swollen (have been for a few days), and my stomach still unsettled. Josh had bought me 7up and crackers, and I desperately ate them hoping to settle my tank- to no avail. I lost my crackers in the first available bathroom at the hospital. Maternity ward was waiting for us, and checked me in to a room. They checked my blood pressure (which was within the "normal" range, but still high for me- my blood pressure is typically quite low). Dr. Hulton came in, and we listened for Evelyn's heart beat. Her stubborn little heart was still beating at 140 bpm! Dr. Hulton checked my blood pressure again and it had returned to normal. They took some blood, etc, for testing, and had us wait in our room for the test results. I slept deeply while we waited, my faithful husband (Joshua Parkin) sitting quietly by me. My test results came back "normal", and they said we could go home. ...not what I was expecting. I had every symptom of pre-eclampsia, but every test denied it. I think I felt relieved? But also very confused. At home, Josh made me ramen and I crashed on the couch for the afternoon, still feeling quite awful. Tonight, I'm a little better in body and spirit, but very tired in every way. This morning we all thought my body was in danger and that we would be forced to deliver little Evelyn. Now we are home to wait some more, with her heart beating along like everything is normal. We are watching my body very closely, as my symptoms linger. We are striving to function as close to normally as we can, for our little boys who don't need to worry. And we are trying to run each moment to our God, even with no answers to our ever-growing pile of questions. I think of this like Jesus' disciples, when He was being betrayed. Some of the disciples ran away and hid, and of the ones left Jesus asked, "are you going to leave me too?". I think it was Peter that replied, "WHERE ELSE WOULD I GO?". That's where I'm at right now. At a time like this, where else would I go, but to my creator, the Giver of life. Answers or none, to Him I run.

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